Pool Panic

Genre: Puzzle / Misc. Game

Players: 1-4 Competitive (Local)

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Review:

Pool Panic is an odd game that its creators describe as the world’s least accurate pool simulator and… yeah, that sounds about right. You play as an anthropomorphic cue ball running around and plowing into other anthropomorphic billiard balls in increasingly bizarre situations.

The first surprising thing for anyone who knows how to play pool is that your ball can move around freely as much as you like. You’re not at all restricted in this regard… but neither are the palls you’re trying to place in the pockets. Some will wander around, some will see you aiming at them and flee in fear, and so on. So while this game starts with the challenge of lining a shot up in pool, it expands to become a lot more fluid and dynamic than any pool simulator ever could be.

This works out to be a really unique approach to pool, to the point where I don’t even really feel like I can call this a pool game and lump it in with the sports games like I might do with a true sim. But the game goes even beyond this, presenting all sorts of really bizarre situations, such as balls stuck in a giant wedge of cheese, or balls that gradually arrive on buses as you play through a stage.

Yeah, on that note, this game’s presentation is every bit as bizarre, and the fact that Adult Swim published this game seems all too fitting. Not only are all the balls here anthropomorphized, but they’re done so in a cartoonish way that would seem right at home on Adult Swim or Cartoon Network, and after completing a stage, your cue ball will blather out the victory theme as it plays. It’s… weird.

The main flaw I’ll point out with this game is that it’s so weird that at times it’s not even really clear what it is you’re supposed to be doing. The game explains the basic controls, but leaves figuring everything else out up to the player, which kinda’ left me in a bit of a daze and all this absurdity surrounding me and what I was supposed to do about it.

I have to admit, when I first fired up Pool Panic, I had a general reaction of “what the heck even is this!?”, but it has an undeniable charm and a really original approach to a classic sport… so original that those who hate pool might love it, and those who enjoy pool might find it not to their liking. However, regardless of which camp you fall in, this game is definitely worth a try.

tl;dr – Pool Panic is an odd game where you play an anthropomorphized cue ball hitting other anthropomorphized billiards balls into pockets, but unlike traditional pool you can move around freely, and so can the balls you’re aiming for. The game is weird, silly, and wildly inventive, although at times it’s not always clear what you’re expected to do. Definitely don’t play this game if you’re expecting anything resembling real pool, but if you want something more offbeat, it’s definitely worth a look.

Grade: B+

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