Construct Farm

Genre: Misc.

Players: 1

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Review:

Construct Farm, released on Nintendo Switch in 2024, isn’t a game so much as it is a creation tool for constructing your own little virtual farm. Or at least that’s the sales pitch.

The graphics in this game use passable 3D, but there’s no movement or animation, and the framerate is absolutely atrocious. It is inexplicable why a game that looks this bland should run this poorly. These visuals are backed by an annoying, extremely repetitive piano theme.

If you thought the presentation was bad though, just wait until you see the gameplay… though you’ll be waiting a while, because Construct Farm has none. At the very least, you might view it as a model-building tool of sorts, except it’s terrible at that too – the framerates are so horrible that your cursor lags behind where you’re trying to move it to, you can’t change the camera angle, there’s no option to rotate or resize objects, pretty much nothing you would want in a model creator is present here. You’d be better off playing an actual farming Simulation game if you want to custom-build your own farm.

At $2, Construct Farm would be pointless and nearly-unplayable. At $10, it’s an outright insult. Please take my recommendation and do not buy it at any price.

tl;dr – Construct Farm is a… I guess farm model construction application… and an absolutely miserable one at that, with horrible performance issues that make it hard to even move the cursor where you want it, a lack of options and features, and overall there’s little here that wouldn’t be done better with an actual farming Simulation game. You should absolutely avoid this game.

Grade: F

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This game has been nominated for one or more of eShopperReviews 2024 Game Awards:

Winner:

The “Who asked for this!?” Award – Construct Farm is a game where you plop down pieces of a farm onto a plot of land… and that’s it. There’s no gameplay here, no goal, not even simulation elements where you’re growing crops. What’s more, you can’t change the camera angle, the game looks terrible, and the performance is atrociously bad. Even if all you want to do is custom-create your own little 3D farm, you’re better off going with an actual farming Simulation game. At least it’s sure to run better than this garbage.

Runner-Up: Worst Game, Most Overpriced

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